Nerd Wars
Episode 6: Return of the Stolen Property
It all hung in the balance. Two victories for me. Two victories for Brendan. One draw. This was to be the deciding round. The outcome would decide, well, not much of anything. But winning doesn’t need to mean anything in order to be fun. And I like to win. It’s a family thing. The Matriarch, when facing defeat, will throw cards. Accusations have been made back and forth regarding Scrabble cheating. The family has, or has had, a thrower of Backgammon pieces. During our stay in Rotorua the Matriarch and I declared war on each other during the family game of Life.
We shouldn’t have done that. It allowed Sulfurous Winds from Below to defeat us.
Back to the task at hand. The war on Brendan’s desk. After he’d so quickly spotted the missing DVDs yesterday I knew I had to make my final attack a worthy one. It had to be perfect. It had to make a clear statement about something. It had to be something in plain sight. And it had to be something he had no chance of spotting. I spent the whole day thinking about it. Every time I walked past Brendan’s desk I’d sneak a peek, seeking that one perfect item.
I found it in his spare RAM sticks. He keeps the innards of every computer that he comes across just in case he ends up needing something. Periodically we hire a skip and he’s forced to dispose of those electronic entrails. Our carport is where old, decommissioned rack-mount servers go to die. It’s supposed to be where the Beaver goes to sleep at night. Our car. Long story.
I don’t believe for a second those innards will ever prove to be of much use. I certainly don’t believe they’re of vital importance to Brendan’s daily life. I decided that “disappearing” his RAM sticks would emphasise that point.
I was sneaky again. I pinched them while he was in the shower. That way he couldn’t prevent me from taking them by simply getting up earlier than I did. I slept fitfully, though, wondering whether or not my decision had won me the war, or lost it.
Brendan also decided to strike another blow. I keep a hairpin on my desk in case I need to use the fan. It traps the irritating wispy bits of my hair so they can’t tickle my ears and neck. A quick scan of the top of my desk was all it took for me to know that was absent. Nice try.
In contrast he had no idea what I’d taken. That final battle ended in my triumph. Final score: Brendan 2, Kath 3. I won. Victory was mine.
Now I wonder what exactly it was I was trying to prove.
Tagged: Entertainment, Hobbies.